Is Forever Enough?
by Batman Lamp-Writer
Summary: One-shot, D's POV. I'm writing this to explain my side of the story, to show everyone that I knew about it. And to say I'm sorry. Mostly to you, Sam. Warning: implied character death.


**A/N: New one-shot! Longest one I've ever made, too! Based on the song "Is Forever Enough" by Hawk Nelson. Awesome song, totally suggest you listen to it! Anywayz, first one-shot of maybe two or three connected one-shots in first person based on HN songs.**

**Danny's POV**

!5 023\/32 3\0()9-?

Those were the last words I said to her, to anyone.

**Is forever enough?**

Three little words that crushed her.

It happened so fast, I can't even begin to explain what went wrong. One moment, I'm at school, getting beat up by Dash again, the next, I'm in the hospital in a coma.

It happened to me, not anyone else, me It could've been anyone, but it wasn't.

Sam got really upset. She cursed off Paulina and Dash when they laughed after I collapsed. She hated that they didn't care.

_You __**idiots!**__ That could've been __**you!**_

They didn't know it, but I could hear them still.

_Yeah, but it __**wasn't,**__ Goth freak._

I hated how Paulina treated Sam, and I hated how Sam treated Paulina. No one in our school could ever get along.

There's a cycle we go through. Everyone, even Sam. We want to be accepted, we want to be appreciated, we want to get everything we dream for, but we don't We want everyone to still accept us after we fail, but we aren't We want life to go after we're abandoned, but it doesn't

We wanteverything to be perfect, but it isn'tEver It's all a stupid game and no one wins. I should know. This is really my third time through that cycle, thanks to Clockwork.

The first time was the accident. I should've died, and I half-did.

Then, the CAT. Clockwork let me keep my alternate-self's memories, up until alternate-I died.

Now, I'm going through it again. This time, there's no Clockwork to reset time. This time, there's no coming back.

!5 023\/32 3\0()9-?

**What makes all of us hate? ****  
****We're all the same  
We roll the dice  
And we play your game  
We complicate  
Show us the way  
Before it's too late  
And the whole thing breaks**

!5 023\/32 3\0()9-?

No one ever understood anything I said. Sure, as Phantom they did, but Fentonwent unheard.

I've protected this town for years, but everyone seems to forget anytime something happens to them, personally. I'm the only one who actually cares about the town. Even the mayor likes getting pictures taking more than the actual people.

But thanks to me, they go on living this way. I've never once been thanked for doing this, but I do it because it's right I couldn't care less about the cycle. I wasn't even sure if I could _die!_

But it's all my fault, anyway. I'm the one who went into that stupid Portal. I'm the one who tripped and fell over some wires. I'm the one who pushed the button.

That's what it comes down to. I pressed the button, so it was my fault. Just like it was Dad's fault for Vlad. Dad was the one who pressed the button then.

And I have to admit, the outfit works better on Vlad. But Dad's mistakes always end up being good. The ecto-dejecto saved Dani's life. The Fenton Thermos only needed a little ectoplasm. And the ecto-skeleton just needed a "rechargeable battery". Dad's stuff always comes through in some way, except the Ghost Gabber. That thing's useless.

But Mom always fixed them. After she'd gotten at them, they worked fine. Again, except for the Ghost Gabber.

I know everyone's worried. Mom, Dad, Jazz, Sam, Tuck. I know I have to keep breathing, to try to make it. I have to concentrate on something to bring me back.

I can't think of anything. I know everyone is expecting me to pull through, but I can't. Clockwork told me.

_This time, it's forever._

He never sugar coated things. Sure, he'd talk in riddles, but he can be blunt, too.

!5 023\/32 3\0()9-?

**We have a name  
We all create  
Everything else,  
the mistakes we made   
We'll make a change  
We'll concentrate  
Before we suffocate**

!5 023\/32 3\0()9-?

It would've been better if I hadn't known. I wouldn't have bothered writing this, and I wouldn't have to worry for my parents and friends. If I hadn't known, I wouldn't have spent the last three months worrying and waiting, trying to find out when it would be.

Every few days I change the amount of time. I want this to be relevant for whenever it does happen, for whenever I do die. I can't just leave it three months old.

I know I have to tell this story. I have to tell my story.

My story's not fun. I'd rather not share it, but I know the time is coming. I have to.

!5 023\/32 3\0()9-?

**Can't hold this in  
And keep it quiet any longer  
I've fallen in  
And now this feeling's getting stronger**

!5 023\/32 3\0()9-?

It took me forever to wake up after the explosion. Sam and Tuck were right there. Mom and Dad were right about the lab being dangerous.

We were young and stupid. Not that we aren't now, but now we're just stupid. Going in there was the biggest mistake I made, but it was the best thing I've ever done.

First of all, I should have died. Though I didn't know it then, Clockwork had saved me. After all, he's the one who sent Phantom to be the first out of the Portal. If it weren't for that, the blast would've killed me.

Phantom merged with me. I could never really explain it to anyone, but I guess I'll have to try now. Sam, I have to tell you, he was a little upset when you accidentally reset time. Ya know, when you gave him his symbol? He kept trying to call out to me, but he couldn't reach my mind. After I got my powers back, though, he basically yelled at me for not remembering. His form of punishment was the "butt ray".

But after that, he cooled down. He's always been there for me, and he'll let me stay with him in the Ghost Zone. Yeah, Sam, there's a black door in there with that symbol on it. He thanks you for that now. He says it keeps people out of his stuff.

I know I'm acting really weird, and I know you probably don't believe that we merged, but it's true. I wanted to explain before, but I couldn't. How could I, with all the fighting and lying going on?

I'm sorry, Sam. That's the worst part of this whole thing. I have to say good-bye to you

But no matter what, know that there was no stopping this. And know that one day, both of us will be flying around again.

!5 023\/32 3\0()9-?

**You take my breath away  
Now I'm trying to get up  
I'm trying to retrace  
My steps back  
To wherever I messed up  
Is forever enough?  
I'm holding on  
I know you'll be there  
Whenever I wake up **

!5 023\/32 3\0()9-?

After the accident, you guys were so great. You accepted me right away, even though you didn't have to. I know you blame yourself, Sam, but Clockwork would've made it happen sometime.

But really, you guys are the best. You helped me figure out what was going on, and you even helped me fight off the ghosts. I still can't believe we went from high school nobodies to Team Phantom so quick. Even though the stupid jocks still picked on us, we still managed to survive school and ghost hunting.

I know there were times when we got on each other's nerves, like when I was trying to be popular. I know I acted like a jerk all those times. Tuck, I know you like Valerie, and I'm fine with that. Well, I am, so long as you don't spill. Sam, I know I was a jerk with the whole Gregor thing. I was just… jealous.

And of course, Tuck's gonna burst out laughing now, but I'm sorry I was spying on you. I should've just asked what was up, but I—I was nervous that you and Tuck hated me. Of course, I get how stupid I was now, but it just… it seemed more serious then. I thought then that maybe you guys had ditched me for him. After all, Tuck could only talk about how cool Gregor was, and, well, we'd had that huge fight. I thought our friendship was over, and for a little while, I sort of wanted my life to be over, too.

Of course, that's when the Guys in White showed up and actually helped for once. I mean, they're the only reason we found out how fake Gregor—or should I say Elliot?—was.

But, really, for a while, I thought it was over. And I really didn't want it to be over.

!5 023\/32 3\0()9-?

**What makes everything change?  
We're not the same  
We all get stuck in the same cliché  
We're taking aim  
We dominate  
Put on the pressure  
Then the whole thing breaks**

!5 023\/32 3\0()9-?

I know how tough school was on the three of us. I mean, being the targets of everyone and surviving wasn't easy. I guess that's sort of the one thing I like about Christmas. There's the Ghost Zone truce and no school or bullies for a week.

But still, all good things must come to an end, right? And of course the truce is only one day.

Darn it, now that I'm writing this stuff down, I can't even explain it all. I guess I'm trying to say that the three of us were really close. We were kind of all each other had, so whenever there was a fight, our friendship was seriously threatened. There were so many times I thought it was just going to end. I mean, let's face it. You two were really different, and my stupidity didn't really help, either. It could've ended so easily, we could've thrown everything away.

But we didn't. Not even when I had those little times of popularity. Not even when you two had those food rallies. Not even when we found out that Jazz knew. Yeah, Sam, she told me about the hard time you gave her, but I get it. You were worried. I just… feel like such an idiot for not noticing. You're really important to me, Sam, and I never could tell you how I felt.

But I guess I sort of just did, huh? Heh, not _Clueless One_ anymore, am I?

Eh, but I'm getting off-topic now. I'm trying really hard to stop doing that, but I'm kind of just writing what I'm thinking, so it's kind of all over the place.

But I should go back to the accident. You guys are the only reason I even kept up in school. I mean, anytime I had to run out, you'd pick up extra work for me. Sure, most of it never did get handed back in, but you guys helped me study enough to keep my grades up enough to pass.

I really don't want to leave you guys. I don't want to become a ghost, and I don't want to live in the Ghost Zone forever. Phantom says I'll have to help him with Clockwork's assignments. Apparently, Phantom is like Clockwork's apprentice, so when I'm gone, I'll be there, too.

!5 023\/32 3\0()9-?

**  
How come we wait?  
Why do we hate?  
We're falling away like the last crusade  
We rearrange  
We need to change  
before we suffocate**

!5 023\/32 3\0()9-?

I said before that Clockwork told me this was going to happen. Well, Phantom was the one who found out all the details. He told me everything so I could write this.

I have to say I'm really sorry, Sam. Phantom told me about the conversation we'll have—er, we had—right before I collapsed, well, got beat up then collapsed.

I finally told you how I felt. It took me forever to gain the confidence to actually come out and say I love you. Yet I can write it out so simply. Random quirk, I guess.

But then Dash had to ruin it all. I didn't even get to hear what you were going to say. He dragged me off and beat the crap outta me. He didn't even care that it was in front of the whole school. No one tried to stop him, not even the teachers. The crowd was so huge, you two couldn't even get to the front until I was about to collapse.

_Danny, I love you!_

That's what you said, Sam. I remember. I'll never forget it.

_I love you! I'll love you forever, no matter what!_

That's when I said it. I knew you were being honest, and I knew I didn't have much time, so I just croaked it out, blood trailing from my mouth.

**Is forever enough?**

!5 023\/32 3\0()9-?****

Can't hold this in  
And keep it quiet any longer  
I've fallen in  
And now this feeling's getting stronger  
Can't hold this in  
And keep it quiet any longer  
I've fallen in  
And now this feeling's getting stronger

!5 023\/32 3\0()9-?

I collapsed after that. You two and Jazz, who called when Dash dragged me off, got me to the hospital as fast as you could. Not that it was going to help, but still, at least you guys actually tried

I think I didn't explain the whole thing with Clockwork very well. He explained what happened in the lab to me, too.

I said I half-died. That's the only reason Phantom and I were able to merge. He took his place inside the part of me who died, and he gave me the strength to survive the blast. After you changed time, the part of me who died came back and took over, but Phantom was still with me, just kind of asleep. When we recreated the accident, Phantom was already there, so it wasn't as bad as the first time.

Clockwork took me away for a week to explain. Barely even a day to you guys, but I was gone. To me, it was forever. Forever away from you.

That's when I found out. He told me first about Phantom, but I basically told him I already knew. It was really sort of obvious to me.

But then he dropped the bomb.

_Danny you are going to die._

I gaped at him.

_I cannot say when, however much you ask. That would be against the Observants' rules. It is against their rules to even tell you about your…demise._

That was his way of nicely saying I was going to die soon.

I begged, I pleaded, but still Clockwork wouldn't explain anything else.

_Trust your dreams._

He'd spew out little, confusing snippets of advice like that.

_Listen to each other, and, more importantly, your heart._

Utterly useless, or so I thought until the day came when I had to actually use that advice.

!5 023\/32 3\0()9-?****

You take my breath away   
Now I'm trying to get up  
I'm trying to retrace  
My steps back  
To where ever I messed up  
Is forever enough?  
I'm holding on  
I know you'll be there whenever I wake up

!5 023\/32 3\0()9-?

When Phantom first told me of the dreams—premonitions—he'd had, I didn't believe him. When the signs first came, though, I began to write this.

As the signs continue to come, I keep thinking I'm going to manage to screw this up. Somehow, something will go wrong, I know it.

I want you guys to keep living after I'm gone, but I know things will be tough, for all of you. School's gonna get rough, too, especially with Phantom missing for a while, maybe even for a few months. I'm not really sure how long it'll be before Clockwork lets us roam again. After all, he lost his apprentice for a good three years because of me. The least we can do is repay the work. Clockwork even trained me that week so I'd be ready when the time came to help out.

But now I'm not so sure I want to help out. I don't want to leave Amity Park. I don't want to leave you, Sam.

Heh, at least Phantom made sure I would have a definite reason to come back as a ghost. Our obsession with protecting people will absolutely bring us back on its own, but add to that the fact that I only worked up the courage to confess to you thanks to Phantom, and you'll definitely be seeing me around again.

It just might take a while.

!5 023\/32 3\0()9-?****

(Now I'm trying to get up)  
I'm trying to retrace  
I've fallen in  
(and now this feeling's getting stronger)

!5 023\/32 3\0()9-?

I want you all to explain to Mom and Dad. I want them to know why I did all that stuff, why I make them worry. Er, made. I want them to know who I really am, not who they think I've become.

I don't want them attacking the few good ghosts that are actually willing to help our town, not hurt it.

Phantom also wants to apologize. He wants them to know that he's sorry for taking their son—for taking me—away from them. He says he only ever got involved to save my life, that, had the situation not been life threatening, he would've just stood on the sidelines.

He also wants to tell them about Plasmius. Much like with my accident, Plasmius and Masters merged together, but theirs was different. Because of the ecto-acne, Plasmius took over their body. It was a true infection. Over time, the festering wound—Mom picking Dad over him—grew worse and worse until, finally, Plasmius threw out Masters' old mindset. I met the true Masters, only once. When Dan showed up. I met him ten years in the future. He was sorry for everything. Somewhere deep down, our Masters is sorry, too.

Don't tell Mom and Dad about Dan, though. I don't want them feeling bad about that. Besides, it'll never happen now.

!5 023\/32 3\0()9-?****

You take my breath away   
Now I'm trying to get up  
I'm trying to retrace  
my steps back  
to where ever I messed up  
Is forever enough? (Is forever enough?)  
I'm holding on  
I know you'll be there  
Whenever I wake up  
Whenever I wake up  
I know you'll be there whenever I wake up  
Whenever I wake up  
If I wake up!

!5 023\/32 3\0()9-?

No matter how tough things get, don't get angry at people. They're stupid, yes, but that means that you can't let their stupid opinions get to you. Just stay calm, no matter what. Don't give in, that's what they want. Never give stupid jerks what they want.

Jazz, you're the best sister I could have asked for. Even when you didn't know the whole story, you trusted me. You trusted all of us. That trust is what got me through most days. You even helped when all evidence pointed towards me being the bad guy.

Mom, Dad, none of it was your fault. I love you more than you might think, and I'm sorry I couldn't explain this to you myself.

Tuck, keep trying your luck with Val. Somewhere deep down there is a heart, and I know you're the person she'll give it to. Also, don't let any power go to your head, alright? I don't need a King Tuck fiasco to worry about again while I'm gone.

Val, I want you to know who I am, but I want to tell you myself. Keep trying at Tuck, but be patient. It takes time to get through his thick skull.

Sam, I'm sorry. I love you, but I can't stop this from happening. I'll see you again some day, I promise. Our love will last forever.

And never ask yourself _Is forever enough?_ It always will be.

!5 023\/32 3\0()9-?****

What makes all of us hate?   
Show us the way  
Before it' too late  
And the whole thing breaks

!5 023\/32 3\0()9-?

**A/N: TEN PAGES!!! WITHOUT A/Ns! ZOMG! And SEVEN WITHOUT THE LYRICS!!!!!! Insanity does odd things….**

**Anywayz, R&R!**


End file.
